To Make Love Grow
t took me years, though,to learn that the love surrounding our family didn’t just happen. We
had to learn about love from one another. In fact, love never just happen--not even to people who
seem as naturally loving as my mother and father. But there is, I think, a climate that is best for love--a way of living that hastens the maturity of this matchless gift.
First, love nccds time. Perhaps people can fall in love in a moment, but mature love is like a tree, moving slowly from the seed in the ground to the sheltering splendor of its prime. People need time to dccpen their affection, to appreciate one another’s differences, to share one another’s joys and grief...
When we accept the differences of loved ones, we find that those very differences provide the mystery and wonder of human relationships. It’s foolish to expect perfection; it doesn’t exist. The key is to recognize and enjoy our differences.
To grow, love needs another, more elusive quality--the ability to let go.
Finally, love needs words to make it real. Without words, quarrels can’ t be resolved, resentment can ’ t come to the surface, we lose the power to share the meaning of our lives. There are many ways of communicating. The important thing is to acknowledge and express our feelings. If we don’t, we deprive others of the knowledge of our love and ourselves of the joy that comes from expressing it.
Love is not a single act, but a climate in which we live, a lifetime venture in which we are always learning, discovering,growing. It is not destroyed by a single failure, or won by a single caress. Love is a climate--a climate of the heart.
让爱升华
然而，许多年以后，我才领悟到我们家里这种爱的气氛并不是自然而然产生的。我们必须互相学习去爱。事实上，爱从来就不是自然而然产生的——甚至对于像我父母这样的人们也是这样的。虽然他们看上去天生慈爱。但是我想有一种氛围对于培养爱是再适宜不过的了，即一种可以促进这种无与伦比的天赋发展成熟的生活方式。
首先，爱需要时间。人们也许可以一见钟情，但是成熟的爱情就好比是一棵树，从土里的一粒种子渐渐地长成一株生机勃勃枝叶茂密的大树。人们需要时间来加深彼此之间的情谊，发现彼此间的差异，相互分享欢乐、分担忧愁…
当我们接受了与所爱的人之间的差异时，我们发现正是这些差异使得人际关系充满了奥妙与神奇。渴求完美是愚蠢的，因为完美根本就不存在。关键是要能发现我们之间的差异，并进而享受由差异带来的乐趣。
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